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Thursday, December 29, 2011

Merry Christmas

What says Merry Christmas Better than a Broccoli lute?
Big Broccoli Ocarina:Angels We Have Heard On High (by Heita3)

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Division/Never Let Me Go



Nameless guilt
hangs over every lyric.
She acknowledges,
and yet another
would not touch it, living on the cusp
raging wanton lust against a burning front.


All I can think of; peacock feathers, fireflies
proof in my mind.


But his, besides
is the love of his lover, the acceptance, the forgiveness
the conscious-numbing divide.


Perhaps it is all too well
Christmas is a reflection of the fall
a draught of religious fantasy
combined with consumerist orgy.
Failed market systems still sell well.


I’m sorry.
I’m so sorry.
I’m sorry that this brokenness leads to vengeance.
I’m sorry your turning has hardened your heart’s yearning.
I’m sorry that I am a poor ambassador, and the steeple’s door
has clanged shut
Shutting you out.
A love letter of judgment.
Bent,
un-condescendingly,
When the One you ought to know condescended so breathtakingly.
He humbled himself, taking on Flesh.
And, to the point of Death.


He it is, I yearn, for you to know.
This Christmas I pray His love would be shown.
to you.


So your P.h.D. theories
would tremble beneath
the weight of His glory.


So your excuses and bitterness
would melt
from the heat of His brilliance.


So your distance and this divide
would be bridged by His Coming.

Blood-shedding Love rumbling across the centuries
“born for such a time as this” and yet has never heard.

This Christmas I pray for providential hearing.
Not just for him, but for all divided from Him.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Diminishing Returns

I'm struggling not to drink the diet coke next to me right now. Should I just take a nap? The law of diminishing returns says I should... and that through taking breaks, naps, and getting at least 8 hours of sleep, productivity increases (such as reaction time) are measurable. I think I should employ this technique of "renewal" breaks between 90 minutes of work as I start full-time thesis work in the coming weeks! And the renewal part is key- doing something refreshing, like a walk or run outside, jump roping or swimming could potential renewable opportunities... 

From the Harvard Business Review blog (by Tony Schwartz):

How to Accomplish More by Doing Less

Two people of equal skill work in the same office. For the sake of comparison, let's say both arrive at work at 9 am each day, and leave at 7 pm.
Bill works essentially without stopping, juggling tasks at his desk and running between meetings all day long. He even eats lunch at his desk. Sound familiar?

Nick, by contrast, works intensely for approximately 90 minutes at a stretch, and then takes a 15 minute break before resuming work. At 12:15, he goes out for lunch for 45 minutes, or works out in a nearby gym. At 3 pm, he closes his eyes at his desk and takes a rest. Sometimes it turns into a 15 or 20 minute nap. Finally, between 4:30 and 5, Nick takes a 15 minute walk outside.
Bill spends 10 hours on the job. He begins work at about 80 percent of his capacity, instinctively pacing himself rather than pushing all out, because he knows he's got a long day ahead.
By 1 pm, Bill is feeling some fatigue. He's dropped to 60 percent of his capacity and he's inexorably losing steam. Between 4 and 7 pm, he's averaging about 40 percent of his capacity.
It's called the law of diminishing returns. Bill's average over 10 hours is 60 percent of his capacity, which means he effectively delivers 6 hours of work.

Nick puts in the same 10 hours. He feels comfortable working at 90 percent of his capacity, because he knows he's going to have a break before too long. He slows a little as the day wears on, but after a midday lunch or workout, and a midafternoon rest, he's still at 70 percent during the last three hours of the day.
Nick takes off a total of two hours during his 10 at work, so he only puts in 8 hours. During that time, he's working at an average of 80 percent of his capacity, so he's delivering just under 6 ½ hours of work — a half hour more than Bill.

Because Nick is more focused and alert than Bill, he also makes fewer mistakes, and when he returns home at night, he has more energy left for his family.

It's not just the number of hours we sit at a desk in that determines the value we generate. It's the energy we bring to the hours we work. Human beings are designed to pulse rhythmically between spending and renewing energy. That's how we operate at our best. Maintaining a steady reservoir of energy — physically, mentally, emotionally and even spiritually — requires refueling it intermittently.
Work the way Nick does, and you'll get more done, in less time, at a higher level of quality, more sustainably.
Create a workplace that truly values a balanced relationship between intense work and real renewal, and you'll not only get greater productivity from employees, but also higher engagement and job satisfaction.
There's plenty of evidence that increased rest and renewal serve performance.
Consider a study conducted by NASA, in collaboration with the Federal Aviation Administration, of pilots on long haul flights. One group of pilots was given an opportunity to take 40 minute naps mid-flight, and ended up getting an average of 26 minutes of actual sleep. Their median reaction time improved by 16 percent following their naps.

Non-napping pilots, tested at a similar halfway point in the flight, experienced a 34 percent deterioration in reaction time. They also experienced 22 micro sleeps of 2-10 seconds during the last 30 minutes of the flight. The pilots who took naps experienced none.
Or consider the study that performance expert Anders Ericcson did of violinists at the Berlin Academy of Music. The best of the violinists practiced in sessions no longer than 90 minutes, and took a break in between each one. They almost never practiced more than 4 ½ hours over a day. What they instinctively understood was the law of diminishing returns.

The top violinists also got an average of more than 8 hours of sleep a night, and took a 20-30 minute nap every afternoon. Over a week, they slept 16 hours more than the average American does.
During my 30s and 40s, I wrote three books. I sat at my desk each day from 7 am to 7 pm, struggling to stay focused. Each book took me at least a year to write. For my most recent books, I wrote in a schedule that matched the great violinists — three 90 minute sessions with a renewal break in between each one.
I wrote both those books in six months — investing less than half the number of hours I had for each of my first three books. When I was working, I was truly working. When I was recharging — whether by getting something to eat, or meditating, or taking a run — I was truly refueling.
Stress isn't the enemy in the workplace. Indeed, stress is the only means by which we can expand capacity. Just think about weightlifting. By stressing your muscles, and then recovering, you gradually build strength. Our real enemy is the absence of intermittent renewal.

Tuesday, December 06, 2011

On Hydrology and Expectant News

Lord, to unload the load
that is lording over me
weight of weight
I see less clearly
I see confusion, joy
it’s clear water mixed with clay, you know that turns murky
when you’ve got the current’s velocity
pushing, pulling, transporting sediment
what it’s meant
to do, of course, but
the roots are too few
to hold the particles together
there’s only inches of bluegrass
and a lot of melting weather

so we’ve got a flood on our hands

(our stained hands)

we need a flood from our hearts

(river of Living Water impart)

we need to be washed in wisdom

(not conformed but transformed)

we need to be overlowing in love
(Your bloody love)
.

Apart from You, woe.
I am lost.
I am undone.
Tossed in confusion, shifting tides;
springs of salt and freshwater combined.

Apart from You, whoah.
I don’t know what to think.
I’m excited for her, doubled in joy.
I’m broken for her, soul destroy.

Oh, my brokeness
I share it with You
to You it’s nothing new
And I lay it down.
And I lay down her’s too.
Not in apathetic resignation, not in giving up

Not in condemnation, shutting up
But in resolution,
on You I will not doubt
For You can make ALL THINGS NEW.
You can do the impossible.
With You it is not done until it’s done.

Friday, December 02, 2011

Living on the edge of a darkness

He.                                          (We call you He but what pronoun will suffice?)
He uses.                                   (What can defy Him to be used?)
He uses weak vessels.              (What design, beyond comprehension.)

This I can feebly proclaim.
This I can verily say.
He just did it again today,
and I marvel.

Laying a burden heavy on my heart,
that was not lifted until I prayed aloud with a dear sister,
and then getting a note that confirms and thanks me for my petitions!

He knew I needed a note of encouragement, to keep walking in this darkness.
It has felt so dark lately. Constant ups and downs. Weariness. 

And now tears spring as His ways seem so much higher than my ways,
His plans so much vaster than my pains.
And it is in weakness I walk and constantly tripping over cracks and sidewalk doubts
Slip and ice and slothfulness,
Oh, but,
This I know,
He uses weak vessels,
Though He doesn't have to, He chooses to.
He chose me.
Not based on anything I've done or do.
Or ever will do. 

Rest in this, refresh in this.
Be still.
I will, by His grace, I will.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Story of grace

When discouragement sets in: finals, a big paper looming, a job search, and the battle to be content in all circumstances...I gotta look up and sing the story of grace.

One way ticket to a lion's den
Got to go through the fire so I can come out again
Fight for my faith, live what I believe
Stand on my feet and sing, oh I will sing,

Jesus, you've called me friend


Jesus, you've made me what I am


Yet in my weak frame I'm calling out Your Name
Broke my heart with Your love, God I will love you the same
Forgiven notions I am brought to my knees,
The story of your grace fills me with the theme,

Jesus, you've called me friend
Jesus, you've made me what I am

Jesus, you're my life within
Jesus, you've called me friend


I will by the light of the glory you shine on me
I will be the grace that you offer so freely

-United Pursuit Band

Friday, November 11, 2011

The Inner-View (?)

I've just entered the position of applying for jobs (and frustratingly finding they are already filled, sigh).
The funny things is, the resume and application is just the first step. They are created to get you an interview. And then, depending on that view-into-you-- (is an interview really an inner view?) there might be a job offer.

This exciting and challenging process has got me keen on ways to market and promote...myself.
I found Seth Godin's business and marketing blog an asset in this new goal, and his article on
whats-the-point about interview questions intriguing and helpful to ask myself. 

Can you really figure out these things from a half hour with a person? Do you really understand who they are, and how they can contribute? Perhaps. Especially if that person is comfortable and confident in selling themselves (or, rather, letting their best shine through, which is how I am trying to look at it!)

What good interview questions are actually trying to discover

How long are you willing to keep pushing on a good project until you give up?
How hard is it to get you to change your mind when you're wrong?
How much do you learn from failing?
How long does it take you to learn something new?
How hard is it for you to let someone else take the lead?
How much do you care?

The rest is merely commentary, either that or they're interviewing you for a job that's not as good as you deserve. For those jobs, the only question they're really focusing on is, "will she fit in around here?"








Wednesday, November 09, 2011

The New Economy

I can't attend this lecture today, but I would be interested more of what Chris Farrell ahs to say. I enjoy his program on MPR and am excited about the idea of a new economy that would shift the American eye from blind consumption to asking the question of what is real joy and happiness. How refreshing.

The Frugal Future

Frontiers in the Environment seminar by
Chris Farrell, Economics Editor, "Marketplace Money," American Public Media
Yogi Berra famously quipped, "It's tough to make predictions, especially about the future." But Farrell is willing to predict that, over the coming decade, the rise of the mobile Internet and the push for sustainability will transform the economy, driving the next wave of creative destruction (economist Joseph Schumpeter's phrase for the process by which new technologies, markets, and organizations supplant the old). For too long society equated living better with owning lots of stuff, much of it bought on credit. We always knew that wasn’t quite right—that what gives us real joy are experiences, learning, creativity, spirituality, friends and family. The promise of the new economy is the opportunity for a life made better not by ownership but by greater flexibility and meaning.

(https://events.umn.edu/The-Frugal-Future-013797.htm)


Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Thoughts on the 99% - Occupy Wall Street Movement

(http://hereandnow.wbur.org/2011/10/13/occupy-wall-movement)

I just read this insightful article by Chuck Bentley. It's a full-on Biblical perspective look at some of the issues regarding the occupy wall street movement. The movement has been discussed in my classes (except hydrology, unfortunately!) and among my peers at school, many of whom want to join in demonstrations and agree with the sentiments expressed.

The take-home message for me is that people are crying out for justice, although their idea of the way to get that justice (through the government) will not actually be able to bring about their desired change-- only a heart change in Jesus can possible make (1) people love God more than wealth (2) want to love the poor and give away their income to help the needy (3) deal equitably and justly with others.

Some main points from Chuck's article:

1. Protesters are angry at greed. (RIGHT ON. Greed is a destructive sin. But can you make it illegal? You need a heart change).
     A. This anger leads them to conclude that the government should redistribute wealth (some issues here, including past governments built on communist principles).
     B. Greed is a close sister of envy. (A heart change is needed here, not legislation.)

2. Protesters want the wealth gap closed.
     A. We need to take care of the poor. (Yes, please!)
     B.  Again, the government that should take care of the poor, not you or me.(Is the government capable of meeting everyone's needs? Should it be?)
     C. How can you achieve fairness and equality through this legislation? (A heart change is needed).


3. No one cares about the "little people," the 99% of us.
    A. Again (again!) the government will bring about equality for the majority of the population.


4.  These are inherently value-laden demands, and often in the secular space of government religiously value-laden legislation has been outright rejected. Acknowledging and openly discussing the values behind legislation is important.


5. This is not just people whining about the lack of sharing. This is a deeper movement and will not just fade away quietly.

Do you think Bentley is right on, or missing the point? And what do you think about Occupy Wall Street? Are you following it, or ignoring it? Do you think we will remember it in 1 year-- or 10 years?


=====================================================================
From: http://blog.crown.org/ by Chuck Bentley

I think we should pay attention to the Occupy Wall Street protests.

If you’ve been watching the news reports of these protests, you know that their demands are all over the map, and few people are taking them seriously. That is a mistake.These protesters are being dismissed, chided and mocked by political conservatives. A very popular financial advisor challenged them to get a job and get rich in order to join the ranks of those they are protesting against… as if getting rich will make greed decrease. Really?

I think all of this is the wrong approach.

Their choice of government over God reveals a dangerous fissure growing in our nation. And Christians need to respond appropriately. A broad demographic but relatively small base of our population is in the streets chanting in favor of placing government in control of matters that have historically been dealt with in the realm of personal responsibility based upon a strong adherence to Judeo Christian values. Who would have ever thought that in the land of the brave and the home of the free, with nearly 75% of the population identifying themselves as Christians, citizens would rally in favor of an agenda so flawed.
I’ve been taking note of the reasons given for the protests, and I think they boil down to three general complaints. Let’s look at each issue in turn.

First, they are bothered by greed. According to the demands of the protesters, the greedy corporations and individuals (the so-called “1 percenters”) need to give more of their wealth in taxes to fund government programs for the benefit of everybody else (the “99 percenters”). Sounds fair (to them), until you examine where this philosophy will ultimately lead us.

In nations where this financial fairness doctrine has been fully implemented, it has led to human slavery and untold suffering. In the countries that I’ve visited where government operates according to the views of Karl Marx, the citizens would more likely protest against it, but they are not allowed to do so. How could anyone in our country embrace something so disastrous, you might ask?

The answer is, they’re confusing government with God.

Logically, you can accuse a corporation of being mismanaged, but not of being greedy. Greed is a problem within the heart of a human. As for the greed of individuals, which certainly is a sin, it cannot be legislated away. The protesters should abandon their desire for communism and espouse one of God’s key financial principles, that we should avoid greed and love people more than we love money or possessions.
Instead, their solution is twisted and based on another sin—envy. This approach would have the government take from some to give to others on a fair and equitable basis. How unlikely is that? How has it worked in countries that have embraced it?

Two wrongs still do not make a right. Which is worse, greed or envy?

How is wanting what others have any less a sin than loving money or possessions? The Bible makes no such distinction. In fact, abstaining from envy or covetousness is one of the most overlooked of the Ten Commandments: “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor” (Exodus 20:17 NIV).

For the record, refraining from greed is not one of the Ten Commandments, although the Bible certainly declares greed to be a sin: “The greedy stir up conflict, but those who trust in the Lord will prosper” (Proverbs 28:25 NIV).

I always thought that was an odd way to make the case against greed; that “the greedy stir up conflict”. Seen within the context of the Occupy Wall Street protesters, it makes perfect sense. Greed has stirred up conflict. It is a problem. But what are the protesters missing? It’s the knowledge that a change of heart is the only way to effectively deal with the problems of selfishness and exploitation.

The next thing on the protestors’ agenda is closing the wealth gap. Let’s put that in a biblical construct as well: caring for others less fortunate than us. This, too, is one of God’s principles—that we should give to the poor. It is our responsibility and privilege to give to meet the needs of others. It gives our life meaning and significance.

The protesters, again, put their faith in government to carry out the need for a generous spirit in our culture. They would force the redistribution of wealth through taxes, regardless of the spiritually detrimental effect this has on all parties. What sounds “fair” is truly fair in this respect—wealthy and poor alike lose their desire to be productive. Equality achieved to everyone’s loss! When the culture of a meritocracy is eliminated, history shows that it leads to fewer benefits for everyone, not more.

The desire to love others and care for the poor can only come from a spiritual transformation—a realization that Someone else loved you first, and gave you the greatest gift imaginable—forgiveness of your sins and a new life through Jesus Christ. Read through the Parable of the Good Samaritan one more time (Luke 10:25-37 NIV) and look for the government’s role in this story.  You won’t find it. No, I don’t think the government is capable of meeting everyone’s needs nor should it be.

And finally, there is this business of the 99%, the idea that the “little people” have no voice and no one caring for them. Well, it’s another of God’s principles that He will provide for us, that He will hear our prayer and that He will never leave us or forsake us. In God’s kingdom, there are no little people… or big people either.

Again, instead of encouraging faith in God, the protesters are encouraging folks to become more dependent on government which can never meet their spiritual needs, and increasingly, not even their physical needs.
More than that, God has always used the small and the weak to do mighty things. Each person is capable of making an enormous difference in the world when we walk by faith and place our trust in Him.
We need to hear their misguided pleas and take them seriously. The protesters are advancing an ideology, a philosophy that if adopted, will be the downfall of the freedoms that made America the greatest nation in history.

If the Occupy Wall Street protesters sincerely want to see greed decrease, the wealth gap closed and have the voice of the “99%” heard, they need the good news of Jesus Christ. In Christ we find peace, contentment, and joy in serving the needy. That allows us to celebrate, not denigrate, those who merit the rewards they have earned.

You and I need to be the salt and light of our time leading America towards a revival. The gospel leads to freedom, while a misplaced dependency upon government leads to slavery. The protesters and America need God, not more government.

Now for my sobering warning -

I hazard to guess that these same people would rail against any legislation that is based upon biblical values, such as laws against same-sex marriage or to protect the unborn or to uphold the death penalty, but they have no problem forcing their beliefs on Christians with the full power of the government. Their confusion of government for God has the potential to produce incredible division and strife in our nation.
I believe these folks will likely go home during the coming winter months, but will be back in force as the presidential election approaches. The coming year promises to be a turbulent one as economic pressures, competing beliefs and the need to make hard choices all collide. Look at Greece and prepare—for the same civil unrest you see there now could happen here in America.

Now is the time to start our own movement to combat the hollow and deceptive philosophy of man. We must infiltrate the ranks of the lost with the Good News of Jesus Christ.


Tuesday, October 25, 2011

$ustainability: Green roofs in Minneapolis and Hope for the Future

(http://www.kestreldesigngroup.com/)

Yesterday in Community Economic Development, our guest speakers included a green roof promoter and an architect. It was a really interesting conversation between an advocate, a designer and finance-focused students. Our instructor asked us the questions, "should we be pursuing sustainable design at all, or is it just a sexy trend?" My insides balked at this question! How could you call something as crucial as sustainability merely a trend? My natural resource management sensibilities were outnumbered in that room of urban and regional planners and public policy analysts, however. And I had to admit the truth that sustainability is often defined as "everything that is good."

The economic angle counters that "it is only good if it is financially feasible." That is a true, albeit limiting, statement. The crux seems hangs on how we can call something financially feasible when we don't account for the externalities (or impact costs, as someone called them), and if we aren't factoring in the subsidies that are underneath finical calculations of fuel costs? The argument is more complex than calculating cost and expected savings, yet that is necessary to do. Is the 7-year payback on the Target Center green roof too long? For a developer or private company, it is. For the City of Minneapolis, with their long-term ownership and stake in storm water mediation, it isn't. (There's also a host of other benefits that went along with it, like workforce training). The total cost of the green roof includes eliminating one life cycle on the Target Center roof-- so replacement will come in 40 years instead of 20. That's substantial.

Overall the conversation was a little depressing. Most of the time, sustainability is not financially feasible (without incentives, cost share, subsidies etc.). I am used to more warm-and-fuzzy sustainability conversations. So I browsed to find out more information and eventually found a Green roofs project compendium open-source website and the latest solar decathlon winner (the U entered in this a few years ago, it's a neat competition held in DC to encourage residential solar innovation).

The University of Maryland's winning project, the "Watershed," is an example of technological and design innovation. I'm excited about these technologies taking off...and hopeful that they will. I recently visited northern Minnesota, where an environmental learning center had newly installed solar panels, vacuum water-heating tubes and wood biogasification to replace their natural gas and petroleum heating sources. Sustainable things like this can and do happen- it's not just a fad or anomaly. I would argue that they need to happen more so that sustainability isn't an after thought, but an essential element to any fiscal policy, development or planning process.






Monday, October 03, 2011

grace

sister says: love me.
dad says: love me as i am.


she says: this is a demand.
he says: this is a plea.


daughter, you have been so loved,
when wretched, hopeless, darkened, blind
when disdaining Me, My enemy
when weak and confined


yet in My deep mercy I called you
even then I sought you
with great love with which I loved you.


I loved you. 


your family will fail you.
your friends will disappoint you.
I will never fail.
I will never leave you.
I will always be with you.


Singing....


        Marvelous grace of our loving Lord, 
	grace that exceeds our sin and our guilt! 
	Yonder on Calvary's mount outpoured, 
	there where the blood of the Lamb was spilt. 
	Grace, grace, God's grace, 
	grace that will pardon and cleanse within; 
	grace, grace, God's grace, 
	grace that is greater than all our sin! 

        Sin and despair, like the sea waves cold, 
	threaten the soul with infinite loss; 
	grace that is greater, yes, grace untold, 
	points to the refuge, the mighty cross. 
	(Refrain) 

	Dark is the stain that we cannot hide. 
	What can avail to wash it away? 
	Look! There is flowing a crimson tide, 
	brighter than snow you may be today. 
	(Refrain) 

	Marvelous, infinite, matchless grace, 
	freely bestowed on all who believe! 
	You that are longing to see his face, 
	will you this moment his grace receive? 
	(Refrain)

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Call & Response 1

Calamities                   (including the wind)
I am content with them    Everything will be made new, from rubble to wrinkle, stumps to scars
Calamities                   (including dearest friend's departures)
I am content with them                                       And day and night the saints praise him together
Weaknesses                (such as stammering and failure)
I am content with them         It is not words of eloquence, but the cross; foolishness, a blockade 
Weaknesses                (such as lacking a post-grad plan, no job, no PHD, post-doc)
I am content with them                                                                      I am content to wait on the Lord


Some trust in degrees
Some trust in titles
Some trust in 401(k)s
Some trust in wealth
Some trust in 'having just enough' tomorrow
Some trust in physique
Some trust in charm
Some trust in rings
Some trust in good works
I will not trust in ......
I will set my hope in You


I say this with remorse
I say this with apprehension
(I don't say it at all)


Can I hide under the shelter of Your wings? That is where you rest
Can I lay my hand on your solid foundation? I will never change
Can You show me my adoption certificate? Chosen daughter, bought with a price
Can You show me that I am Yours? You are sealed with My Spirit

Thursday, September 08, 2011

Love like a...

I'm overflowing now, just typing words right into the night.
The footballers are balling. My to-do list is calling.
The bee-sting is still swelling. Thoughts welling.

Thoughts about new technology,
Androids and iphones,
Always connected, but never really knowing.
Seeing the updates and moving on to the next newsfeed.
Wandering rabbit trails,
It's glued to my hand now, invisa-shield and all.
Is it a time-saver delusion or obvious inefficiency?

I'm still burdened by lists and expectations,
Self-righteous proclamations
And worrying and wondering what others think.
Stop.
Drink.

When you're overflowing, when the words are coming,
they don't have to be perfect, so full of meaning.
A depth beyond believing.

Girl, you are just learning.
Just living.
Just a 27-year-old breathing.
Waking up each day.
And failing.
Not saying the right things / waiting impatiently.
Judging / rehearsing the debt in my head.
And, oh, that uncertain future.
Instead of rehearsing the truth!
Instead of the good news.
Switch.
Repent.

Rehearse, speak, live and believe the Truth.
His hands set you free.
His blood washes you clean.
His love is so full right now, for you, even you.
It's bursting.
It's like a mango dripping down your chin,
as you stand and laugh and bite in again.
It's the warmth of a wool yurt and a fire,
the feeling of being home
and safe
and known.

Wednesday, September 07, 2011

Food Citizens

Fred Kirchenmann is someone I really respect. I heard him speak once, and I remember re-reading my notes and just being in awe of his prophetic and visionary words about our food system and being food citizens. (If you eat, you're a food citizen!) He just got a fancy award (article here) for his hard work.

He says about the future food system, "This will need to be a food system that functions more like wild nature, which operates on sunlight, and on self-renewing and self-regulating biological synergies. This means that everyone in each local ecosystem - farmers, researchers, politicians, consumers, ordinary people - will need to become engaged as 'food citizens' to design food systems that function well in these new circumstances in each watershed."

Here's another quote from the article: "My father somehow understood that the devastation of the Dust Bowl was not just about the weather, but also about the way farmers farmed, and he was determined that, 'That was never, ever, going to happen to his land again,'" he said. "So he inculcated a land ethic in me at a very young age. Later when I first entered a career in higher education, I was introduced to organic agriculture by a student of mine and based on research he had done, pointed out to me how dramatically soil health could be improved with good organic management practices. That eventually led me to decide to go back to our farm in North Dakota to convert it to an organic farm to restore the biological health of our soils." That's a cool combination of wisdom, values, heritage, all of which he applied through his life.

I want to be like that.

Fred spent time with the lovely Leopold Center and currently runs the Stone Barns Center for Food and Agriculture in Pocantico Hills, N.Y, where I hope he continues to make a big impact on our needy world.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

A new call to Trust

Trust Him, that words will come.

Trust Him, every tear is bottled.

Trust Him, that no stroke of the pen is wasted, it is living and active, it will accomplish.

Trust Him, that suffering is building endurance, character, and hope.

Trust Him, when words fail and apologies are needed.

Trust Him, for wrongs of omission and choosing.


Trust is needed

as steps of faith
follow an unseen Shepherd
down a narrow way.


Trust Him,

when Kijabe wind sweeps

dust into crevices [weaknesses]

I'd rather leave untouched.

Trust Him with seeing.

Knowing,

where am I going that lacks your breadth, height, depth?


Amidst itching, grief and confusion,
pity at suffering

and anger at injustice,

You are near.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Humbling critics

Writing a proposal allows me to find out how poorly I write. In an earlier draft I wrote that the “results found that xxx.”

Which made sense to me, in my head…and luckily my adviser and reviewer extraordinaire pointed out “results don’t find. Researchers find or results show.” Of course! Got it. On to another humbling track changes comment! 

(And there is no point in scrutinizing this blog post for good writing, or any of them for that matter! This is a critic free venue! Not that I disdain the critics or the edits. I need them. They just sting. A bit. And was over-achieving, I would grab Peace Like a River and take solace in a quote from Swede about writing and critics to share with you...)

Friday, June 03, 2011

Putting Everything

Most men are not satisfied with the permanent output of their lives. Nothing can wholly satisfy the life of Christ within his followers except the adoption of Christ’s purpose toward the world he came to redeem. Fame, pleasure and riches are but husks and ashes in contrast with the boundless and abiding joy of working with God for the fulfillment of his eternal plans. The men who are putting everything into Christ’s undertaking are getting out of life its sweetest and most priceless
rewards.

J. Campbell White Quoted in When the Darkness Does Not Lift.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Still.

'Be still my soul' and Isaiah 40:27-31 are the themes of my heart right now. It feels like I've been carrying a burden of sadness, even amidst much birthday joy and school progress. And most of the sadness comes from thinking I know what is best, and feeling disappointed when it isn't being delivered in my time table! Oh, help me to patiently wait.

Isaiah 40
27 Why do you say, O Jacob,
and speak, O Israel,
“My way is hidden from the Lord,
and my right is disregarded by my God”?

28 Have you not known? Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He does not faint or grow weary;
his understanding is unsearchable.
29 He gives power to the faint,
and to him who has no might he increases strength.....
31 but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength.

Be Still, My Soul
Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side.
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below.

Be still, my soul: when dearest friends depart,
And all is darkened in the vale of tears,
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrow and thy fears.
Be still, my soul: thy Jesus can repay
From His own fullness all He takes away.

Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord.
When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul: when change and tears are past
All safe and blessèd we shall meet at last.

Be still, my soul: begin the song of praise
On earth, believing, to Thy Lord on high;
Acknowledge Him in all thy words and ways,
So shall He view thee with a well pleased eye.
Be still, my soul: the Sun of life divine
Through passing clouds shall but more brightly shine.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

A true happiness.

I've been realizing, through my reading, through friend's facebook posts, through conversations- I've drifted from the basics. Maybe due to business, neglect...laziness. But this quote in my email this morning was refreshing.


What else does this craving and this helplessness proclaim but that there was once in man a true happiness, of which all that now remains is the empty print and trace? This he tries in vain to fill with everything around him, seeking in things that are not there the help he cannot find in those that are, though none can help, since this infinite abyss can be filled only with an infinite and immutable object; in other words by God himself. -Blaise Pascal


I feel like my needs are manageable, and that I can manage them! Oh, how wrong I am. My needs are never-ending. Now that the semester is finished, I don't feel as happy and content as I thought I would! I am still discontent. Let this dis-contentedness drive me to the Source that can fill me- the only unending and unchanging Source of joy.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Redeemed only by love

I take literally the statement in the Gospel of John that God loves world. I believe that the world was created and approved by love, that it subsists, coheres, and endures by love, and that, insofar as it is redeemable, it can be redeemed only by love. I believe that divine love, incarnate and indwelling in the world, summons the world always toward wholeness, which ultimately is reconciliation and atonement with God.
-Wendell Berry

Monday, April 18, 2011

R.E.S.P.E.C.T

“There is a difference between American and Latvian women.”

Really? “What it is it?” I wondered aloud during my weekly ESL conversation.

“Well,” began my friend, with his Baltic accent, “It is that American women, and even Russian girls who have been here for awhile, seem to disrespect men.”

“Oh.” I nodded my head, with a slightly furrowed brow.

This isn’t everyone, he assured me, but as I thought more about it, I thought to myself “it’s most of them.” And I am a guilty party. I’ve ridden the current feminism for a long time, and it isn’t entirely in vain. Men can abuse and oppress and disrespect women. But it goes both ways, and female disrespect seems to be a more subtle and culturally acceptable behavior- in fact it’s common. Whether it’s an eye-roll, a condescending remark, or blatant criticism, I’ve heard it, and I’ve done it.

This has just got me thinking…and realizing I am imperfect and failing- and need to confess, repent, and accept forgiveness. This also makes me want to have a renewed, redeemed, reclaimed vision of what a man is, and I want to respect it. I want to honor God in all my attitudes and actions, including respecting men. Even respecting men who are not worthy of respect, and doing so not out of manipulation or solvency, but out of obedience. For Christ’s sake.

I long to see more expressions of true manhood, with men fulfilling living out their maleness for God’s glory! (Same for females, too.) But a godly guy- a real leader- kind of makes a girl’s heart melt. It’s kind of the feeling that…this is the way it’s supposed to be.

Monday, April 04, 2011

Suffering

There is in every life a cup of suffering. Jesus Christ referred to His agony in the Garden of Gethsemane and at Calvary as His cup. And had it not overflowed with His life poured out for men, we would have perished.

What a picture of my Master, sharing the wine, the very life blood of His own suffering from His overflowing cup, poured out at Calvary for me. He is there with me in every storm. My Shepherd is alert to every approaching disaster that threatens His people. He had been through the storms of sufferings before. He bore our sorrows and was acquainted with our grief. And now no matter what storms I face, His very life and strength and vitality is poured into mine. It overflows so the cup of my life runs over with His life...often with great blessings and benefit to others who see me and stand up so well in the midst of trials and suffering.

A Shepherd Looks At Psalm 23, by Phillip Keller (p. 123-124.)

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Music of the Dance

For roommate night, we enjoyed the Northwestern College Faculty Artist Series, and heard Flutist Michele Frisch and her ensemble with Harpist Kathy Kienzle, the 'Bell Alma Duo, perform a wonderful show. Operatic, ballet and dance music by long gone composers was re-invigorated and sometimes re-arranged for flute and harp (with special guest viola). It echoed through Nazareth Chapel and inspired the words below...and we topped off St. Patrick's Day night with Shamrock shakes. Bravo!

Mario Broeders, Three Pieces for Flute and Harp

Marble blushes
with the thought
that marble's maker
should be sought
sold, traitored, hung.
Marble's maker crushed
and life re-begun.

Serge Prokofiev, Morning Serenade (Aubade) from the ballet Romeo and Juliet

I sing in the morning,
I dance,
spring up though one sleeps
veiled in cold death.
Through her window, does her heart beat to my song?
I am greatly distressed,
she does not join me,
'ere long,
never to join again.

Aram Khachaturian, Adagio of Spartacus and Phrygia, from the ballet Spartacus

Led down long and dusty path, minutes left.
Longing, violence awaits.
These hands shackled,
oh but to- would it be better?-
I shudder the thought but fear your fate
my love, my love.
I see her no more
and quietly plot
stoic face until my jailer rewards himself with a draught,
and slashed, his head
hangs, where is she stayed?
Find her I must- help!-
Cloaked, with bribe money spent,
and another fool lays dead.
And my beloved in my arms,
we are fled.

Alexander Glazunov, Petite Adagio from the ballet the Seasons

Blessed bliss of seasons turne
Forgotten not the summer lark song,
Along side a frost-bittten burn,
Which winter's shade shall spurn,
Then, wings to spring and mark,
summer's fern.

When autumn komt,
Ich weiss nicht vergessen,
Red leaves and crisp air press in
to escort the frost, the ice, the snow
the clouded sky, the north country blow,
for surely waiting brings blessed fruit,
and from deepest sorrow shoots happy root
All bourne from Creator's lute.

Joseph Lauber, Quarte Danses Medievales, Op. 45

Such a clarion call
to beauty's spell
a chill in the air
yet spring's blossom smell
assures self of hope
'neath the March of snow;
of life beyond death's hold,
of a perish-less frame beyond this decay,
of unstained garments beyond this day's pains.

M. Roesgen-Champion, Danse Rituelle

Silver wand,
mirth maker.
Golden bow,
earth shaker.
You hum and resonate,
you call and herald fate!
(Is this not heaven, endless tunes to praise His name?)

Manuel de Falla, Spanish Dance No. 1 from the opera La Vida Breve

Her heart, broke.
She died.
I hope he carries that
grief all the days of his life.

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

Wo to the man

Happy 100th Anniversary of International Woman's Day! Last year I attended an event for International Woman's day the theme was on women and water. This year the theme was 'women and hunger.' I attended an "Interactive Hunger Banquet" sponsored by Oxfam. I went with two great friends and even saw previous professors and my old boss!

A highlight was hearing a Haitian farmer share her passion for self-sufficiency related to food. Jacqueline doesn't want handouts, she wants partners. She wants Haiti to be independent from Foreign aid. I was struck by how crazy it would be if Canada or England had many workers across Minnesota giving us grants and providing food and medical services. What are the effects of dependency, when capacity isn't built for locals to do it themselves? It's just deeper spirals of dependency.

Jacqueline started a farming cooperative that works together to take care of each other and improve the land. (And this is SO NEEDED for a nation such as Haiti- the statistics are unfathomable).

The broader plea was for women to be at the center of any food solution (as primary food growers and preparers.) Leaving women out of that discussion is disastrous. And often, due to lack of education and political powers that be, women aren't in the discussion.

The Hunger banquet was interesting. We (along with the majority of other young folks) were in the 60% "poor" group. We sat on the floor and ate a meal of unseasoned rice. 25% of the "middle class" sat in chairs and ate a meal of beans and rice. And 15% of the "rich" ate at tables and had salads, bread, and pasta. We literally left the banquet hungry*! But the impression was made. We are among a privileged who live in abundance. And I am grateful. I want to live in a way that recognizes this- that isn't gluttonous, but strategic. And I want to serve in a way that empowers farmers like Jacqueline- I want my nation to give aid in that way- and doesn't trap people in cycles of dependence.

I think Oxfam's work, especially on a political/policy level is important. But this talk encouraged me to keep moving towards working with development and bringing real change to people's livelihoods. Perhaps with Food for the Hungry or ECHO, or Care of Creation... groups that are combining the daily bread we need to conquer hunger with the deeper, spiritual bread we need to be truly satisfied.

*Note: We also promptly used our blessed resources to buy frozen pizzas and french bread and chocolate and feast together :)