When I start to
Fall apart:
Disintegration
The loss of integrity
Windstrewn
The gradients in and out
of tune
Fearfully, fitfully
It’s not elegant like the movies
Yes it’s more a like
A swollen red eyed heap of sobs
Every choice a wake
A break a
Stake
A chagrin inside my chest
A shudder
Stunted despair
Will it grow or blow out the flame?
When I feel
the burnout on the inside
a fractured, unintelligible
Cataract of ashes and
Dust
But don’t forget the stars
That flame with a calling and a name
Called out
Reframed
Those threads that were unraveling
Slowly stop
The shaking subsides
and I drop
Lower, deeper in my chest, decompress
and find myself again
More, together
More like a light
And less like a shadow
More like breath
And less like the wind
