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Tuesday, April 27, 2021

When I was praying

I had a vision of a young boy running, age 4 or 5, he was swinging his arms around, white skinned arms pumping, and he was smiling, dashing around that yard, chasing and playing 

then I saw another boy, similarly running, similar age but with brown skinned arms, jetting off here and there, parents calling in the background, siblings flying all around, and all the jumbled mess that makes a family.


And I thought

this vision could be the child who will become Derek Chauvin, that shining son, that running one, before every lie implanted, every falsehood redacted another’s humanity.

Here’s the boy who would become George Floyd, before every care he carried was laid on his shoulders, the yokes he bore: addiction, racism, trauma, rejection and on and on, here’s the laughing child of Texas soil playing in the sun. 


Here he is before, the hardening.

Here he is before, the breath-taking.


Here they are before they met and fate intertwined their lives with regret, bills and badges and boots on necks.


And I thought of two brothers, I don’t know their skin color but I’ve heard it’s olive brown, who were working outside a garden, one with sheep one with the ground. Until one in fury struck the other one down, mastered by hate and jealous rage until his brother’s blood cried out from the ground. 


I thought of a God who sees the laughing boys in childhood, knows the sensation of their fingers chasing the breeze, knows their fears, their fragility, who sees the brothers before sin came and crouched at the door,

Who sees with justice and mercy all the circumstances, the circuitous choices that avalanche into lives on trial, to tombstones marking their fallen bodies, to tears and blood and laughter barely echoing in a far off memory of running, feet pounding, joy surrounding their cries from running in the yard.....


I take comfort in the Eternal Presence, The God who sees it all and knows it all and loves, oh how He loves.